The Poetry Pirate.

I was thinking this morning (for reasons undisclosed I have a lot of time for thinking at present) about what role, if any, I serve in this strange digital space that we all share.

I have thus been forced to acknowledge that much of my time sailing upon the high seas of WordPress is in the search for hidden treasure to pilfer and deface. I am a poetry pirate. When the poetry of others comes into my view I tend to leap aboard before stealing all the good ideas and escorting the original owners off the gangplank and undertaking a shameless defacing of their vessel and then setting it adrift as an unrecognisable piece of wreckage.

There have been lots of victims. You know who you are.

Sorry about that.

My latest victim was Ivor, who you may know as a fellow countryman of mine and published poet of some renown (any brief investigation will reveal that I have not published a word myself, and am a multiple university dropout). I want to publicly thank Ivor for accepting the invasion in the spirit that it was intended.

Ivor was relating, via his poetry, his passing thoughts whilst lying in his hospital bed. Recalling all the wonderful drugs that they hand out freely in hospital as a source of inspiration, I immediately leapt into bed with Ivor and set about my work.

Here is what he had to say ….


And I decided to walk

To the south side of the moon

Taking my own spoon

I heard there’s a cheese-cake tasting

A sweet crumbly base

Topped with blueberries and cream

Life’s not about lying in bed

I’ll meet you for a kiss

After school

Down by the old pool


…..and here is my response


Lying on the pillow

Feeling kind of evangelic

The drugs that they are feeding me

Must be sort of psychedelic

Eclipses out my window

Though that may just be the curtain

‘Cause the nature of the universe

Is suddenly uncertain

Got to hold onto my sanity

So they’ll let me out of here

So in moments of lucidity

I dream of you, my dear

In hope beyond futility

That we will reunite at last

As I revisit treasured moments

And go dredging through our past

Searching through the memories

Recalling special bits

Like the day you met me by the pool

And let me feel your tits


So you have all been warned. I take no prisoners.

13 thoughts on “The Poetry Pirate.

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